A Competition: What's The Most Revolting Thing You've Ever Done?

>> Feb 15, 2010

The sound of rain hitting the tin roof started with a gentle patter quickly turning into a deluge, I looked from my book through the mesh window looking out over the African plains.

-What the hell?

It was clear blue sky and not a rain drop in sight.  I stood up to get a closer look just as the guide started yelling excitedly for us to come outside.

It wasn't rain hitting the roof but ants.  Apparently flying ants only fly to mate and once done their wings fall off and they drop to the ground.  We looked around in amazement from the safety of the doorway as a deluge of ants dropped from the sky and the local Malawians ran around chattering excitedly scooping them up into buckets.

'This good to eat', one grinning young lad said holding a fist full of ants out at me.

I recoiled in horror.  He had to be joking, right?

The young lad just shrugged and shoved the hand full into his mouth.

I vomited a little in mine.

As quickly as the ant rain started, it stopped and we stepped tentatively out from the doorway looking around at the locals collecting the last of the ants.  Some of the youngsters were snacking from their buckets but a group of guys at the back were getting a fire going.  They were, it seemed, going to roast them.

A large tray was brought out and much chattering and arguing in Chichewa, the local language, proceeded as these men stood around no doubt having the same argument men cooking over open fires have everywhere and within a few minutes we were proudly shown a tray of roasted ants.

The guide held it out to me.  Why is it always me first?  I stepped back and started to shake my head but he looked so pleased, so proud of what he was offering that I couldn't say no.  I reached out and took one.  These weren't small tiny UK ants, these buggers were at least a full centimetre long after they'd been cooked.

I averted my eyes, tried not to think about what it was and put it in my mouth.  The plan was to just swallow it and have done with it but I couldn't make myself swallow, my gag reflex had closed off my throat.  My mouth was filling with saliva and I was starting to taste the dead bugs slowly liquidizing in there.

I fought back the urge to vomit.

I tried a couple more times to force myself to swallow to no avail.  In the end I leant over and in a very unladylike fashion, spat the ant into the dirt and then kept spitting and spitting trying to rid myself of the horrible taste.  The place rang with laughter at the silly muzungu (white person) and I spent the entire night and in fact rest of week, having my ant eating attempt mimed to me followed by several minutes of hysterical laughter.

I wish I'd just eaten the damn thing.

What's the most revolting thing you've ever done?  Write your own blog post on it to win...

...a copy of the book 100 Most Disgusting Things On The Planet...

...and A Bug's Life DVD

How it works: Write a post about the most revolting thing you have ever done or witnessed, link to this post and then come back here and put your details into the Mr Linky form below.  I'll choose the most toe curling story and post the winner over the weekend.  You have until midnight on Friday.  Competition open to anyone, anywhere in the world (the DVD is region2).

*This is not a sponsored post, both the book and DVD are provided my me, they are both brand new, the DVD still in cellophane wrapper.*

Posts on other revolting things I've had in my mouth
Making Myself Sick With Stupidity

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